Have you ever been at a social, sporting, business, family or other such event and been encouraged by somebody to drink alcohol? Picture this, you are standing around at a family Barbeque talking with your close relatives.
Along comes Uncle Joe holding his martini and says, " what's wrong, you not drinking?" Another scenario might be that you and a relative are socializing at this Barbeque and the host approaches you both asking if you'd like a drink.
The person that you were talking to says, "sure, I'll have a beer," and then you ask for a bottled water and your relative says to you, "why don't you have a real drink!" The scenario that I shared are very common and can bring up some very uncomfortable feelings in people who choose not to drink.
I have often wondered what causes the alcoholic to attempt to encourage others around him to drink along with him.
I am going to share with you a few ideas from my professional and personal experiences.
In doing so I am not at all judging, I am just attempting to educate others.
One reason that I think is the reason for this behavior is the alcoholic's feeling of shame for his behavior.
If he is not the only one drinking and/or if he can convince a loved one to drink he can then feel less shame.
Another explanation for this behavior is that because he is in denial about his alcoholism he tries to rationalize his behavior to himself by getting others to drink.
Have you ever been told by an alcoholic, "maybe you would have more fun and feel more relaxed if you'd just have a drink with us.
" Another common one is, "you need to chill, can I get you a drink?" In my work with people who are members of families and social circles where they are encountered with this I recommend that they try one of the following; 1.
) Respond by stating something like, "I'm fine, I don't want a drink.
) If the alcoholic is more persistent try, "Hey, I don't tell you NOT to have a drink.
" This usually gets them to shut up! Hopefully this article was helpful! Please feel free to post any responses and questions!